Lately, I think I mastered the art of relaxing and unwinding that it doesn’t take me long to switch from “WORK MODE ME” to ->”OFF-WORK ME”. I think my brain logs off the moment I log off my computer, that’s how quick it is these days. It’s crazy because I used to have trouble switching on and off. I used to think about work and I STRESS ABOUT IT even when I wasn’t at work.
I think about stuff like, “I didn’t have to make that mistake if I only did this or that.. Why did I do that, I should’ve done it the other way”. I let some small mistakes linger in my thoughts longer than it should be instead of learning my lesson and moving on. I’m so obsessed with doing things a certain way.
I used to hangout with my colleagues a lot and when I’m with them, we still talk about work and our co-workers. Thinking about it now, it’s definitely not the best way to spend your day off. It’s okay to vent, but not to the point of that’s all you talk about.
When I started working at my current job, I also took my notes home to study. My job and some other jobs require you to be constantly learning but I also believe that our brain needs time to turn off so our body and mind can completely relax. Some people have trouble switching on and off and this used to be my problem.
I have some friends who can’t stop checking their e-mail because they don’t like that their e-mail piles up when they leave it unread. So they check it even when they’re on vacation and gets stressed when they see a problem at work.
Now I’ve gotten better at this work life balance thing and I think it’s very important that we find time to de-stress after working so hard and I want to share some techniques that helped me.
My Morning Ritual
Prayer of Gratitude + Reading the Bible
I started this new ritual when I wake up- I read my bible, I give thanks to God for waking me up and start my day with a prayer of gratitude before I do anything. I watched Piolo Pascual’s interview about how he does this even before he checks his phone and I think it’s a really great practice.
That’s why I bought this one year bible recommended to me by Carl Benson to guide me on what to read for a whole year. I just started but it has already made a huge impact in my life and decision making.
Just wanna give you an example, I was so stressed about planning my Camino De Santiago trip that I just want to cancel it and then the next day I read a verse about northern Spain- Santiago De Compostella which is the end point of Camino De Santiago walk is in northern Spain. That made me feel like it’s a sign that I should really go.
I’ve always wanted to start reading the bible more but to be honest I just don’t know where to start. Do you just read from the start? How do people know which chapter or verse to read?
Exercise + Grounding
After that I do some light stretches before I go for a quick walk or jog and then do at least 10-15 minute (more is better) grounding session while meditating and just try to appreciate life. I go near the seaside, close my eyes and just listen to the waves and birds. Really calms my nerves and gets me ready for the day.
What are your morning rituals that helps you get ready for the day?
So what is Grounding?
Also known as earthing, a wellness practice that involves making direct contact with the Earth’s surface, like walking barefoot on grass or sand, to connect with the Earth’s natural electrical charge and potentially promote well-being. This connects your body to the natural electric charge of the earth, transferring electrons into your body. Some research shows that soaking up electrons can lower inflammation, ease stress, and improve sleep, to name a few.
Source : WEBMD (Read full article HERE)
I read about it a few years ago but I never really made time to do it even after reading all the benefits because who has time right? Everyone is always rushing in the morning to go to work and on your days off you just want to sleep in and rest. I ALWAYS HAD EXCUSES.
But starting last year, I made it my mission to make time for self-care to unwind and de-stress. I go hiking to be in nature and then go to onsen to sooth my aching muscles. I travel to new places to discover new things. I make sure I have time to go see my family and friends and I also make sure I have a good amount of time alone so I can appreciate other people’s company.
This year I want to level up with meditating, yoga, more exercise, grounding and bible studying.
Socializing
With the right people, socializing can also be.. relaxing 🙂
I really want to be better at socializing. I must admit, that after COVID, I think I got used to being isolated that it became the norm for me. I can easily spend 2-3 days alone on my days off and not be around anyone. I don’t know if it’s normal but it certainly is different from how I spend my days off pre-COVID.
During my teenage years and in my 20’s, I was always surrounded by people but now I’m in my 30’s I noticed that my social battery gets depleted quite easily. Maybe it’s age? Maybe the after-effect of COVID isolation for years. I don’t know but I wanted to fix that.
This is why I started a meet-up group that originated from my desire to bridge the Japanese and foreign community in Japan. I thought, most of the time a Japanese and a foreigner get together is for language exchange but what if people get together for other reasons, like a common interest like going to concerts or a trip? I think that would be much more fun way to learn the language.
Now our group has a mix of Japanese and foreigners who goes together for a hike or just meet up for lunch or go see a concert. Lots of awesome people who has a great story to tell, if you just talk to them like it’s the 90’s- before social media took over our lives.
Social Media Detox
How much time do you spend on your phone every day? Do you find yourself reaching for your phone every 5 minutes? Do you find yourself scrolling through social media for hours and hours on end?
One of my pet peeves when I hangout with people is when they’d be on their phone while “listening” to me. I once had lunch with a “work friend” and she was on her phone texting THE WHOLE time we were eating. That’s the first and last time I went out with her because I ended up repeating everything I say because she didn’t hear it the first time.
I see this on dates as well. You ask someone out and you spend half of the time on your phone instead of getting to know the person you’re out on a date with. Why go out in the first place? You should’ve just stayed at home and be on your phone.
I think it’s very important that we do a social detox every now and then. I feel sorry for the kids who didn’t have a proper childhood because internet and gadgets became normal than playing outside with your friends. I feel lucky I got to experience that because it was one of my core memories growing up.
I myself, spend a lot of time on facebook organizing events and talking to people so on my days off, I just want a break from it that I turn off my notification. One of the best times I must say. It feels good to not look on your phone and check notifications and I highly recommend it. Why not start with turning off your notification when you sleep if you haven’t done that yet.
Trying Something New..
Travel and Hiking
I try to do something new or go somewhere new at least once a month. It gives me something to look forward to instead of just going to work, sleep and go to work again the next day. Right now I am trying to go to all 47 prefectures of Japan and I am on my 27th. I am also trying to hike the 100 famous mountains of Japan which I have a long way to go.
It sounds like exhausting going to the mountains to hike and all that but it relaxes me to my very core.
Onsen + Massage = Relaxing Time
I also like going to onsen or public baths. Anywhere with a rotenburo/ outside bath, I’m there.
One of my go-to places is Yokohama Manyo Club. You can stay here for as low as ¥5,850 with drinks and ¥６,400 breakfast if you’re a member. The night view is so nice at the top floor overlooking the Cosmo Clock 21 Ferris Wheel and Yokohama city lights. You can also get akasuri and a massage here which is one of my favorite ways to relax. I can spend 24 hours here without getting bored.
They also have different branches so you get a different vibe everytime and some branches (if not all) have Kashikiri Baths/Private Bath for couples or families. It’s a nice place for dates as well. Especially their branch in Tokyo Toyosu Manyo Club because it’s next to Toyosu Senkyaku Banrai and close to Odaiba.
*Please check the recent prices/coupons on their website and a separate blog about my solo weekend escapade at Tokyo Toyosu Manyo Club.
When I went to Hokkaido last year for the Sapporo Snow Festival 2024, I went to onsen everyday. It feels like heaven every single day.
This is the list of onsen that I like and the ones on my bucketlist all over Japan. Hope you enjoy them as much as I did:) Not all Japanese onsen are tattoo-friendly, but some are. Some will let you go in if you have one or two small tattoos. Some will ask you to cover them. My tattoo at the back of my neck is small and can easily hide with a towel so I’ve been quite lucky but if you have a bigger one, multiple, or a sleeve you might want to call them first and check if they’re tattoo friendly.
For those with tattoo
These are some websites where you can find reviews of places that allows tattoos.
Writing a Journal
One of my stress relievers is writing on my journal, either on paper or online. I write when I’m feeling overwhelmed. I write when I feel overjoyed. I write when I’m in pain or going through a heartbreak. I write even when I don’t know how to explain how I’m feeling.
I just..write.
It’s one of the best ways for me to release my feelings to the universe.
Pamper yourself because if not you, who will?
“Life is too short to not treat yourself, especially when you set the precedent for how you want others to treat you.“
Every payday I set aside a budget for a massage. I don’t do nail art much or buy high-end bags but I do spend money on massage and hair. Massage used to be really expensive in Japan and I only get it when I go back to the Philippines or when I go to Thailand, but nowadays you can get a massage for cheap.
I suggest download HOTPEPPER Beauty App and you can search for coupons around you. I always try different places using these coupons. It’s a hit or miss but I just try to remember the names of the staff that I liked.
You can also get points whenever you make an appointment through them and you can use those points to pay later on. If you log in on your browser you can translate it to English so it’s easy to use.
My go to place near Yokosuka-chuo station are:
- Ryukyu Relaxation for whole body oil massage- ¥4,890/hour. I always ask for Kudo-san because she gives a bomb head massage as well. Sometimes I splurge and get the 2hour session because it is just so good.
- LADASIA Yokosuka Chuo -I tried Ms. Yuka’s lymphatic massage before and I also really love it. They also do Thai massage there.
- Ashi Tsubo SalonQ – This is my favorite foot reflexology salon. Been going since 2019 when I first moved in Yokosuka. ¥2,000 for 30min session and they give you a foot soak before the massage.
- Alicebelle Hair Garden – I always go here for haircut and hair-straightening treatment but I also go for a good old headspa once in a while.
Last but not the least is my own bath tub at home. I take a hot bath almost everyday before bed with bubbles, bath salts or Magnesium flakes while listening to piano music to relax. I’m an old soul and this is my jam:
Adding magnesium flakes to a hot bath can offer benefits like:
- Helping you sleep
- Boosting energy levels naturally
- Promoting exercise recovery
- Maintaining heart health
- Improving mood
- Ease of supplementation
- Muscle relaxation
- Improved skin hydration, as magnesium is easily absorbed through the skin.
- Magnesium is known for its calming effects on the nervous system, contributing to stress and anxiety reduction.
Am I not worried about my utility bills because of this? I asked around how much other people are paying for their water and electricity/gas bill for those living solo and the difference is not so much, maybe about ¥2,000. I pay about ¥7,000-10,000 for my gas/electricity combined and ¥2,200 for water each month.
I also have a clothes dryer at home (super convenient by the way because you don’t have to hang your clothes especially when it’s raining outside.) So paying for the difference is so worth-it. This is a non-negotiable for me. I cannot sleep well without taking a hot bath before bed especially now that I work dayshift/nightshift rotation. It’s like a signal to my brain to start cooling down after work.
By the way, I cannot recommend this dryer enough because I don’t think I can ever live without one ever again. My clothes dry super quick and so soft I don’t have to iron them. I just hang them or fold some of them after. Such a timesaver!
Date Yourself, and treat thyself real good.
I am not afraid or ashamed to eat at a restaurant by myself. If I want to try a new restaurant, it’s easier for me to go by myself instead of waiting for other people’s schedule to clear up. I have this weird thing that when I have a craving, I have to eat them ASAP or it wouldn’t be as good as when I originally wanted it.
It’s also easier because I have no one to disappoint. I’ve had an experience with people not liking the food at the restaurant I picked and I just end up feeling bad. Also because some of these people are very vocal about blaming me for choosing that particular place. Aholes right? This is why I’m very picky with the people I eat with now. I don’t like picky and rude eaters.
Yokosuka is a food haven.
There are sooo many places here that I always go to and these are my favorite.
- Loco Coco – My favorite Filipino joint owned by my favorite couple. I like eating here because it has a homey vibe.
- Mano e Mano – Italian restaurant owned by a couple. I was never disappointed with any new food I try here. Everything was just soooo good!
- Villagrazia Trattoria Siciliana– Nice cozy restaurant near the station.
- Gorkha Palace – Indian restaurant near Yokosuka Navy base womble gate.
- Uoyasan no Shinsen Kaiten Sushi – Nicer quality sushi and probably my most favorite in Yokosuka.
- Sushi roll cuisine ole 俺 – American style sushi.
- King Burrito and Chicken – Best burrito and Korean spicy chicken.
- Piacere – Italian restaurant with one of the best pizza I’ve ever had.
- Sunny Side Kitchen – Love their fried chicken and waffles.
Relaxing Activities
Art Museums
One of my favorite relaxing day activities is going to museums. This is something you can do by yourself. Honestly I find it easier to go by myself than to go with other people because I can go on my own pace. I can stare at a piece for a long time without worrying if someone is waiting for me or if I’m taking too long. I highly recommend you to do this at least once.
Painting
Going to museums also inspires me to paint on my own. Whenever I see a nice painting online, I take a screenshot and I try to copy it. People tell me I have a lot of hobbies and interest and some of them cost a lot of money but we only live once so I intend to live this one fully.
Going to a concert – by yourself.
I recently went to a concert by myself and I loved every minute of it. I was always hesitant to do it but after having done it, I don’t know why I was scared.. I had a really great time! I was able to take in every songs without distraction. I cried while listening to one of my favorite song of all time.
If you’re gonna do this for the first time, pick an artist that you really like. I did and I have no regrets. Mine is Mr. Big on their last tour ever. I knew I had to go and see them for the first and last time. When they started playing the instrumental intro of “Just take my heart” is when I started crying- the whole 4 minutes and 23 seconds.
To be fair, I was also going through something that week so I think it was the perfect time and venue to release everything I was feeling that time. Unforgettable experience for me.
Go for a walk
I have some few spots in my area that I love going whenever I want to do some reflection. I love going to one for sunrise and the other one for sunset. Both places are close to my heart.
But if you want to take it to another level, I highly suggest you go hiking/trekking because the sunrise and sunset views in the mountains with all the clouds and colors are on another level.
My Favorite Hikes for Sunrise and Sunset views are :
- Karamatsu – Hands down the best sunset and sunrise view I have ever seen in my life.
- Tonodake – Worst hike I’ve ever done but I still loved the sunrise view above.
- Tsukuba – We did a sunrise hike in December and while I really loved the view above, I think it’s better to do it when it’s warmer so you can enjoy the view better.
- Moiwa – Last but not the least is Mt. Moiwa in Hokkaido. I did not hike this one, but still one of the best sunset views I had. I took the ropeway so it’s easy to go even if you are not a hiker.
Self-care is a must and we all have different ways to in our lives. However you want to practice self-care is totally up to you and these are just suggestions that worked for me. We are all wired differently and what worked for me might not work for you and it’s up to you to discover what works for yourself.